Hey. Just thought I'd drop by because I've been a little absent lately. Also because I'm so handsome. It's probably good that stop in and tell everyone what's what because otherwise maybe you would think I was kidnapped and being ransomed off to the highest bidder at the high-end man-whore slave auction. There, there. All your concerns, albe-they super legitimate, are for naught. I have evaded any kind of capture and am not involved in any sexy escapades involving narrow escapes, leaps of faith, or tight-rope three-ways. I was going to write something about going to Marrakesh* with a troop of sexy acrobats but then The Wiggles came on and I love those guys.
So anyway(s), I'm working hard and don't have time for you people but in the sensitive feelings in my heart you are still number one or at least number 4 and in keeping with my blood oath of always posting when I feel like it, here is my latest find from the internet:
This is the perfect gift for the home invader/ pedophile in your life because nothing warm kids up to their impending rape like Pikachu! This cuddly pokemon ski-mask will keep you nice and anonymous for any number of applications from convenience store robberies to scaring the fuck out of seniors who will mistake this adorable pocket monster friend for a demon! HAHAHHAHAA! Notice also it can be worn rolled up to look like the gayest Viking Helmet that ever was. Like if a viking wore this shit on a crossing of the Icy Atlantic than you can be sure that Njörðr would exact his vengeance upon him for being too fruity. And if you think I had to look up Njörðr, to find out he was the Nordic God of the Sea, than you have obviously underestimated my genius, and that's pretty much the last mistake you ever make unless you follow the links below.
Here's my Mama Pop Article on Youth in Revolt.
Michael Cera is the new black. And I don't mean JACK Black! (*slide whistle*)
After 11am EST, you can go there and read my take on the upcoming Tron Sequel.
Hint: Disney sucks my wang. (Notice I didn't use any gross adjectives like "hard" or "hairy" or "enormous", because I believe in your right to decide for yourself. Also because as My Mom used to say "The proof is in the pudding", and Man, did she get upset when I stuck my enormous, hard, hairy wang in her pudding!)
*Marrakesh is the single-most exciting place to have sexy adventures, because look at that "k" in it's name! How Foreign! How Sexy!